Best Christmas Movie ever, and falling apart and keeping it together in this time

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 They never told me there would be so many ways to be broken open in this time in one short incarnation. Breaking open coming by way of feeling and witnessing, experiencing the incontrovertible truths revealed along side the rigid, white-knuckled clinging to ignorance, the astonishing beauty and the incomprehensible horrors, the infinite depths of love in close proximity with sheer hatred, the ecstasy of aliveness and the twisted worship of death, the monumental collective mystical visions revealed followed by the crushing obliteration of all possibilities. But that's the way it is, and I've somehow grown to almost welcome the totality of it, even the tears and paralyzing periods of hopelessness and confusion, as it all somehow invariably leads to another deeper level of contemplation and expanded awareness - often feeling like a rebirth into still another universe of unknowns. Ok, bring it on, damn it!

    Awareness of death is the constant, whether its closeup in our personal world or on the other side of the planet, whether related to a friend or an iconic personality of the world stage, of a whole species/tribe or a single creature. Either in the present moment or in some past memory, so much death seems pointless and 'un-natural', meaningless no matter how one views these events through whatever spiritual practice, reflection, teachings, scriptures, cosmologies, or profound utterances of revered sages and enlightened masters. And yet there is clear knowing, truth be told, that its not those man-made mythical 'gods/lords' who are the ones that possess "immortality" [this knowing requires severe perseverance of inquiry].
    Still I have yet to achieve any level of abiding psychological equanimity around the reality of this apparently near-total condition of a death-culture planet. I can only take the dualities in, and let my beingness assimilate and process the strangeness as it's able. I often contemplate transitioning/crossing over to the other side, just to end the disturbance of continuous incomprehension. I also know my time/window could be one minute from now.

    Besides being broken open on a daily, if not hourly, basis by the fact of living fully in the moment with my beloved, on a razor's edge of managing a mysterious affliction (which is btw a 1-1/4 billion dollar/year Wetiko-controlled death-and-greed-business), there are all the elements of the death-culture insanity which inevitably creep in from the larger Matrix to our nearby environs and hit us up with constant reminders of the micro-macro interplay.
That being said, the other side of the coin, so to speak, is the equally inscrutable  phenomenon of 'saving graces' which appear in the midst of overwhelming thoughts of throwing in the towel. [Yes, we do have an incredibly beauty-filled life!] The graces can come in the form of uplifting creativity by like-minded individuals, known and unknown, by convergence of wild natural elements arising in our presence, friends bringing our attention to astonishing corroboration of truths we know in our hearts and guts but whose exposures/acknowledgements are vehemently opposed and obstructed and obscured by the death-culture and its mouthpieces…there are uncountable ways and forms of Grace's appearances.
    How challenging and mind-expanding is caretaking for a loved-one with a potentially "terminal" illness? There are no words. Try it sometime. The ultimate exercise in stress-management. The ultimate in self- and love-discovery.

    Here we are again, with another Christmas showing up, just around the corner. This year, sit the family down in front of your favorite audio-visual-projection device and check out, to my mind, the best ever Christmas movie: Dakota 38. This short (1 hour, 18 min.) documentary is way more than it initially appears to be. Reality as it is, on so many levels.

    Anyway, much, if not most, of what's contemplated throughout any given day, as well as what gets written, revolves around and returns to the central issue of Sentience, for me, even if/when traveling through time and space on unreasonably wide tangents. For the last some amount of days, there have been really wide tangents due to various intense inputs, so there's likely to be some major wandering here today.

    A place to start would maybe be a new physics article brought to our attention by "aangirfan" - "In a Rainbow Universe…" Quite interesting in a "Shiva/destroyer-of-time" sense, but also about the other 'places' which one can go with this theory: "Some scientists believe that with 'different energies' ( or wavelengths or frequencies) we can experience different worlds (or space-times)"….the "universe consists of an infinite number of frequencies or dimensions of life that share the same space"…."particles with different energies will actually see different space-times"….Anyway, much food for contemplation.
    The day before seeing the above, I was standing in the snowy yard welcoming the sunrise with my coffee and tobacco, when a sense of clarity arose. Musicians/drummers can have a visceral understanding of how all creation is vibration, and how the infinite sea of vibration is everywhere with no beginning nor end, how it consists of an infinite spectrum of wavelengths and frequencies. It suddenly became clear to me that it's also possible that the "spectrum" of consciousness and sentience is equally infinite. Remembering Henry Beston's quote about the non-human beings: "they are other nations, caught with ourselves in the net of life and time", I thought that it's more likely that in addition, they are simultaneously occupying overlapping consciousness frequencies with us as well as primarily being "home" in other "locations" of space-time. Perhaps species are strung out along the spectrum, some being closer, others farther, from one another. The point being: that there are no 'higher-and-lower' levels or hierarchies of sentience, including vegetable and mineral forms, even.
Then, the next day I read the Rainbow Universe article and one anonymous commenter wrote the following: "Our thoughts are our vibrational frequency, and LOVE vibrates at the highest frequency. This explains the sentience we recognize in our animal friends". Comforting synchronicity.

    Then, this morning I find this in my email: "The Incredible Story of how leopard Diabolo became Spirit…" , courtesy of amarynth.
I really can't comment on this, except that it completely broke me open. In a beautiful way. And that it's maybe the best little (13 min.) animal-communication vid ever. (Also…I had a feline friend in this life who told me profound things very similar to this transmission, and deeply life-changing.) 

    One more vid, a break-you-open piece by "michaeljohn": "Almost Home"  to accompany the same song by an artist named Moby. Description: "This is a simple story. It's not unique or fantastical. It's not clever or grand. It's a common story told from a different perspective.This video is dedicated to those who love unconditionally yet have been abandoned. May they find their home."
    For someone who worked daily for 3 years in a public animal shelter, this cuts to the core. Do I need to say again "every innocent creature is precious"?

    I notice that Uranus went direct on Tuesday, along with the Full Moon. More collective upheaval and anarchy may ensue, which may or may not be unwelcome at this stage. Also, as the town astrologer pointed out to me in the line at the Post Office - on New Years Day: the Sun will conjunct the Moon (New) conjunct Pluto!. Some kinda maha-reboot action there coming our way in 2014, as this sets the astro tone for the whole year. Or…it could just be, as Bob sang, "total destruction the only solution"…..

    The war on innocence proceeds at a feverish pitch and like a broken record, as we've become accustomed. The warriors seem to never sleep. This just in:
"ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. (AP) — Companies in New Mexico and Missouri could begin slaughtering horses within a few weeks after a federal appeals court removed a temporary ban that was preventing domestic horse slaughter from resuming for the first time since 2007...The 10th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Denver lifted an emergency injunction Friday that it had issued in November after animal protection groups appealed the ruling of a federal judge in Albuquerque…"
    You see, ranchers, slaughterhouse operators, politicians, and other Wetiko-plague-infested forces are "concerned" about "the most humane way to deal with the country's wild horse 'overpopulation', and the 'rising number of neglected and starving horses as the West deals with persistent drought'." Proponents say "it is better to slaughter the animals in humane, federally regulated facilities than have them abandoned to starve across the drought-stricken West or shipped to inhumane facilities in Mexico". Can't you just feel the genuine concern, compassion and empathy? I mean, there's just no other way to solve "the problem", right?
    If only someone would come up with a better idea, but, alas….absolutely NO ONE has a better idea, apparently (cough). Sort of reminds one of the "destroy the village to save it" days of the Vietnam war era. I'll have more to say on that shit too, but later.

    Also, a lawsuit has just been filed by WildEarth Guardians to disband the infamous USDA  "Wildlife Services" (formerly "Animal Damage Control"), annual killers of ~3.4 MILLION wild animals [2012], unaccountable to no one, with no oversight. Example of their handiwork: Coyotes: by arial gunning - 26,000; by sodium cyanide [illegal M44s] - 14,000; trapped - 23,000… probably bogus figures, but you get the idea.
    While that's the constant background noise in our public lands and commons, we have an Idaho parallel to our own recent New Mexico coyote-killing contest insanity: a competitive "Wolf Derby" put on by "hunters' rights organizations" [Idaho For Wildlife] for the week after Christmas (kids' division too!), wherein prizes will be awarded for the largest wolf and most female coyotes. Not making this up. Stated purpose is: "to show the world that no one can stop us from killing wolves" – not you, not me, "and especially not the federal government". (Wanna bet they're all good 'christian patriots'?)
    Um, maybe I should mention the famous "All you animal activists, Fuck You!" video of the horse slaughter advocate here in my state (you didn't see it?) - the one that made the evening news and went viral: dude leads a beautiful healthy pony from his barn toward the camera, strokes the horse on the head, turns to the camera, flips the bird and says the above obscenity, then proceeds to pull out his handgun and shoot the horse in the head. Yeah, its on Youtube, and uncensored HERE (warning: awful).
    All you can do is realize there is no "WHY?". Such a level of hate, mental derangement, and spiritual depravity and emptiness cannot be comprehended by the non-Wetiko-ized consciousness.  Our so-called civilization is so wetiko-ized that it's taken till now to expose what finally has come out with crystal clarity in Rolling Stone magazine's extensive essay "Belly of the Beast".  It's now the situation throughout the industrialized world…and about time.

    This whole argument/debate over 'animal rights'/ sentience is nothing but pure bullshit, philosophical mind-fuckery, and archontic time-and-energy wasting programming to keep the human slaves distracted with personal material pursuits.
It's about soul, nothing more, nothing less. The 'indigenous soul' as Martin Prechtel refers to. It's either intact or absent/lost. Enough said. Get over it, and get on with it - total liberation. Support the liberationists any way you can - "terrorists" who have NEVER harmed a living being - they are the warrior heroes of our time.
Note: ANIMAL LIBERATION FRONT WEBSITE HAS BEEN DOWN FOR 4 DAYS! I guess they've been reporting too many successful raids/releases/rescues around the world, as people are slowly, finally waking up everywhere. 

    I notice that the local health food store now carries the "Paleo diet" magazine, and local restaurants carry "Paleo-burritos". What freaking insanity. It's fuckin 2013, not 20,013 BC. More confusing bullshit. This kind of shit is also promoted on websites like "Signs of the Times" (Sott.net), with their arrogant smug holed-up-in-their-ivory-mansion idiots constantly telling us "whole grains are poison", and making continuous "bacon jokes". What pieces of shit, along with their total denial of anthropogenic climate change (google: conservatives pump 1 billion a year into climate denial…), their denial of existence of chemtrails, insistence that Boston Marathon was real, marijuana is bad, etc etc. Most "conspiracy/progressive" websites and radio are full of shit these days, run by former right-wing, barely-waking-up self-described "truth seekers", that are massively promoting racist, misogynist, homo-phobic, right-wing, fundi-christian ideologies. I would be wary of ANY blogs or websites associating IN ANY WAY with these assholes. I'm talking biggies Rense, Truthseeker, Rappaport, Jim Stone, and a slew of others. LITMUS TEST: anyone whose articles, or who link articles containing the word "COMMIE" is an idiot, moron, ignorant loser, and probably a fascist-in-denial.

This last month was really wacked, with the 50th JFK thing and then Mandela. Re: JFK - you had to have been there. More than "a president" was blown away….more like possibly a million real changes that 'might have happened', of which visions we let ourselves entertain for a moment. Gone in a moment! Everything that followed led us to this moment today. People still believe some 'commie' did it. There is a mountain of evidence that points to both Nazis and Zionists. Do your own research. It was most likely all of the above plus many more - but, no 'commies'. Just like there were no Arabs on 911. But you all probably know all that. I'm just ranting. It was a tough month. Just trying to move on, trying to accept that things are the way they are. We do what we can, and spread the love a bit every day. Justice seems not to be in our hands. Maybe we'll see when we cross over, who knows?

Said there would be some wide wandering here. I wish everyone peace and safe sanctuary in this trying time.